JD Vance Dresses in 'Drag' and the Right Looks the Other Way

In the meantime, they criticize Tim Walz's 23 years of military service because he left to run for office.

Author’s Photo

Meet the young and wild JD Vance. A college student prone to wear women’s clothes at parties to be “goofy,” and someone who would take a liking to eyeliner (the word is he had it permanently inked into his skin, giving him now that eternal poutiness). 

There should be nothing wrong with the joy and comfort JD finds in women’s apparel. Still, since he decided to closet these needs, he has become somewhat of a crusading Robin Hood on this subject — stealing joy and comfort from Americans desirous of exploring alternative paths as they explore their gender identity while handing mocking joy and hate to close-minded and ignorant Americans. 

Close your eyes for one moment and imagine how the entirety of the right-wing fascist hate machine would react if such a photo of Tim Walz had been found. Can you hear the outrage and seething ignorance percolating? I can. 

JD Vance is a hero on the right to many. He served four years in the Marines in Iraq during a war. He was a public relations officer. His weapon was a pad and a keyboard. He was indeed stationed in Iraq, and indeed, battles were taking place far from where he was sleeping at night. JD’s duty was to report on the progress of the battles and the lives of his comrades and otherwise create a positive perception of the war for American citizens. He was, in short, a propagandist. After four years, he left the service. Maybe, as we see above, he wanted to return home to dabble in some harmless cross-dressing, or perhaps he just felt that he had fulfilled his duty to his country.

Tim Walz served honorably for 24 years in the Minnesota National Guard. He retired two months before orders were cut for his unit to go to Iraq in 2005. The unit was deployed for one year, five months after he had left to run for public office. The faux controversy here is all based on the comment Walz made below in an emotional moment as he spoke out against the public health crisis of guns in our communities.

Vance and the Trump campaign have also accused Walz of embellishing his military record, seizing on past comments he made in support of gun control when the governor falsely said, “We can make sure that those weapons of war that I carried in war is the only place where those weapons are at.” Walz was never deployed for combat (Veteran Slam Trump and Vance for Attacks).

They are calling his comment above a case of “stolen valor.” 

Are you disgusted by this as much as I am? Republicans lie about absolutely everything! The last time a Republican member of Congress uttered truthful words was probably a decade ago or so. The right-wing media machine feeds on deception and obfuscation. In 2024, however, this attack on Walz is all the Grand Old Party has to link the party to the rapidly-vanishing hint of what they used to stand for. Formerly a party that used to stand for strong defense and military families, Trump’s Republican Party considers anyone who serves a “suckers and loser.” 

In a statement to CNN published Monday, Kelly delivered a scathing criticism of former President Donald Trump while confirming reporting in The Atlantic in 2020 that detailed the comments he made during his presidency.

“A person that thinks those who defend their country in uniform, or are shot down or seriously wounded in combat, or spend years being tortured as POWs are all ‘suckers’ because ‘there is nothing in it for them,’” Kelly said of Trump. “A person that did not want to be seen in the presence of military amputees because ‘it doesn’t look good for me.’ A person who demonstrated open contempt for a Gold Star family — for all Gold Star families — on TV during the 2016 campaign, and rants that our most precious heroes who gave their lives in America’s defense are ‘losers’ and wouldn’t visit their graves in France.”

Tim Walz served honorably, and he is a good American patriot. He was a career school teacher and a football coach. He is the epitome of good America. Enough. It is time we ignore this nonsense. 

Nonetheless, it is also time to congratulate JD Vance for his fondness for cross-dressing. There is nothing wrong with this, and it should be celebrated. It is time we punish him for being a despicable hypocrite. We need to punish all Republicans for their blatant and offensive hypocrisy.

As a kid, I used to love going into magic shops. There was always a rotating stand that held all kinds of practical jokes. These jokes can still be found in some shops and malls today. One thing that I used to love was the small bottles of “fart juice.” When you opened the bottle, a powerful sulfur smell would fill the room. Let this become the way we deal with right-wing hypocrisy. The moment someone starts to talk the usual bullshit Fox/Trump talking points, unscrew the cap and fill the air with the pleasant odor of a faux fart.