Dear Big Bird, I am not Abigail Van Buren or any of her relatives who maintain the column. However, I have enjoyed so many of the things you have written, I decided to comment on this one, as well. Your friend Svetlana's decision to bring her own containers was inappropriate, but whether it was a minor infraction or very rude depends on a couple of factors. If you have given her left-overs in similar previous occasions, then she might have thought she was doing a favor by not taking your containers. If this is the case, her actions were presumptuous but forgivable. However, if she has never received left-overs from you before, then she was rude and a poor guest. Perhaps it was somewhere in between and you might have to both fume and forgive. And perhaps not invite her back - that's the real decision facing you now. In any case, don't let one bad actor affect your love of entertaining - you are offering a lot of people the gifts of food and camaraderie. Bless you.
Dear "Abbey," No, I had never given her leftovers because when he family has been over in the past they eat everything to the point that their kids freely root through our refrigerator! ))...She also brought a bottle of Port wine--it was my birthday the next day--and I set that aside. We had plenty of wine. She did make a point to ask me where the wine was that she gave me, opened it, and then proceeded to drink 1/3 of it...again, I want people to leave drunk, full and happy so I don't care but it really began to seem to me that she had a fixed amount in her head of value that she put into this party and wanted to at least triple that value--by eating, taking leftovers and drinking--before she left.
I would have reacted the same, but felt better a week later. Time heals all wounds, however slight
Dear Big Bird, I am not Abigail Van Buren or any of her relatives who maintain the column. However, I have enjoyed so many of the things you have written, I decided to comment on this one, as well. Your friend Svetlana's decision to bring her own containers was inappropriate, but whether it was a minor infraction or very rude depends on a couple of factors. If you have given her left-overs in similar previous occasions, then she might have thought she was doing a favor by not taking your containers. If this is the case, her actions were presumptuous but forgivable. However, if she has never received left-overs from you before, then she was rude and a poor guest. Perhaps it was somewhere in between and you might have to both fume and forgive. And perhaps not invite her back - that's the real decision facing you now. In any case, don't let one bad actor affect your love of entertaining - you are offering a lot of people the gifts of food and camaraderie. Bless you.
Dear "Abbey," No, I had never given her leftovers because when he family has been over in the past they eat everything to the point that their kids freely root through our refrigerator! ))...She also brought a bottle of Port wine--it was my birthday the next day--and I set that aside. We had plenty of wine. She did make a point to ask me where the wine was that she gave me, opened it, and then proceeded to drink 1/3 of it...again, I want people to leave drunk, full and happy so I don't care but it really began to seem to me that she had a fixed amount in her head of value that she put into this party and wanted to at least triple that value--by eating, taking leftovers and drinking--before she left.
Sounds like a someone I wouldn't invite back. There are people you could pick off the street who would be better guests.